The 3 P's
Proportion, Posture & Presence
"Confidence isn't walking into a room thinking you're better than everyone, it's walking in and not having to compare yourself to anyone at all”
Proportion, Posture and Presence: How You Present Yourself to the World
I love these 3 words! They are the difference maker. They are visual confidence. Even if you are not feeling 100% great one day, if you can objectively focus on these 3 things you will be able to fake it till you make it! And at some point in the day it will effect how you feel internally and give you a lift. These suggestions that follow are ways to enhance what you already have. They are ideas for tapping into your "well" so to speak and it just makes this life more fun. This combination is the “magic pill” for inner and outer beauty!
“the joy of dressing is an art” John Galliano
Proportion
Dressing for your body The key here (as in all things in life) is balance. It really doesn’t matter your body shape. No one and everyone is perfect. The “ideal” body shape changes over time, culture, and is subjective. So remove the words “if only” from your vocabulary. Those are empty words that drain your beauty and are unproductive. You are here, you are beautiful, so go ahead and accept the fact that you do not need to change or get anything externally to make you whole. You can achieve any look you want through balance of shape and style. I am offering some general rules that I follow, however, it is ok to experiment and go outside the box if you know yourself well and what feels good to you. But generally, clean lines, simplicity, and balance of proportion for your body work best at enhancing your natural beauty.
Quick tips to Balance Proportion Effortlessly
Balance volume with volume: if one half of your outfit is loose, let the other half be fitted. ie wide leg pants with fitted top, oversized top with fitted pants. There is a place for both oversized top and bottom but a defined waist is important.
Define your waist: this is one of the easiest ways to create shape and proportion. I find that most women are comfortable “hiding” their waist with a shapeless shirt because they feel it’s covering up imperfection. But even subtle waist definition can create visual proportion. Try front tucking your blouse, adding a belt when appropriate or even a cropped jacket.
Add a little structure: This makes clothes look polished and intentional. Consider a cuffed sleeve, a clean neckline or even a collared shirt.
Remember, proportion isn’t about making your body look different. It’s about creating visual harmony.
Posture
Having good posture may bring up childhood memories of your mom telling you to sit up straight at the dinner table, so if you feel resistance I get it! But, as usual, mom was right--she just may not have presented all the benefits in the most inspiring way.
Traditional mindset of good posture is pulling your shoulders back. However, that can look quite awkward, stiff and unnatural. Stand in front of your mirror and try this: Tummy slightly engaged and pulled inward, place fingertips on sternum and lift up from there. Then imagine a string attached to the top of your head gently pulling it up. Can you feel and see the difference?
Your diaphragm opens up and your organs have space. You will look 5 lbs lighter and appear and feel more confident! What a powerful shift both physically and energetically.
Presence
What does it mean to “be present”? To be present and to have presence are two different things but one effects the other. To be present in the moment is to give your attention fully to what you are doing or who you are talking to. The opposite is to be in your head with your attention on all of the thoughts leaping around. You might be daydreaming, worried about bills, planning your grocery list, etc. The beauty of being present and fully emerged is you are able to get the most out of the moment. Time is insignificant. You tap into peace, contentment, joy, even sadness. Whatever it is, you are letting your body and mind fully process and experience the event. This creates presence. You feel grounded, confident and are able to give to others more freely.
If you are speaking with someone, making eye contact and listening will get you far! What a gift this is to another person! Even if you have said little, they will come away from your conversation thinking you are a great conversationalist. I have seen this again and again. So even if you are on the shy introverted side, it’s ok. Most likely the other person will describe you as down to earth, easy to talk to and a pleasure to be around. Just offering a listening ear and your presence is enough.
Getting comfortable with proportion, posture and presence creates elusive magnetism. That is a just a bonus because the real gift is how you feel inside. When you are present, you are actually living your life and that is the most beautiful thing of all.